Night Feeding. It’s a part of motherhood whether we like it or not.
It’s also the part of motherhood that I find causes mums the most amount of stress.
Questions about your baby’s sleeping patterns are endless. Is she a good baby? Does he sleep through the night? My baby sleep 7pm-7am, doesn’t yours? (and the look that accompanies that question)
It’s enough to make you want to poke out your eyeballs. These questions also have the power to make you feel like a terrible (even the worst) mother.
In reality, you’re doing an amazing job! Night waking and feeding are a natural part of this whole parenting gig. Babies need to be fed, feel safe and be nurtured, waking frequently at night achieves these things.
Now, I’m a mum of two (a 4 year old and 1 year old). I have a bit of an idea of how this whole scenario feels. My 4 year old has *just* started sleeping through the night consistently. My 1 year old has not slept through the night, and I don’t see it happening anytime soon. Am I a failure? I don’t think so, I’m mothering my babies the way that aligns with my core.
Needless to say, I’ve had a few quiet hours during the night to contemplate life. I realised very early on that the key to thriving during this season is…….surrendering.
Surrender to your child.
Surrender and let go of expectations.
Surrender to the need to have a full night sleep. One day, your child will be sleeping through and eventually not need you. Enjoy the time with them.
Once I was able to surrender during the night, amazing things started to happen.
I started to enjoy the time one-on-one with my baby.
I realised that a lack of sleep was ok. I could function much better than I ever realised.
I felt more and more in love with the little babe in my arms.
And on the business side of life, when I surrendered my biggest and greatest ideas came to me.
This business (and this blog post for that matter) was one of those ideas. I was feeding away just in my own thoughts and the idea for a marketplace of ecourses for creatives just entered my mind. Once baby was back to sleep, I ran and grabbed my journal and started writing. I wrote a lot! In a short half an hour, this whole business was outlined, I knew what I wanted it to be and my vision became very clear.
I wanted to create a space and community for women and mothers where resources were plentiful so they could start their own business and discover another side of them that maybe was missing. I want them to feel like they are contributing to the family in an additional way. I want them to find something that fires them up and gives them another purpose (I’m not saying that not creating a business means you have no purpose. I just know that many mothers need that something for them) within their life. I also want women to have the choice. The choice to have a family, stay with with the kids and like us, unschool and hopefully one day travel whilst still creating an income.
I can honestly say that without surrendering and embracing the night time feeds, this would not have happened.
If I had of been fighting every night, there would not have been space to think, dream and make this vision a reality.
For this, I’m eternally grateful.
I totally agree. My son only started sleeping through the night after 2.5 years. He is 3.5 and we still have some broken night now over nightmares or coughing… We sometimes need to accept things as they are and let go the expectations so we get more at easy. Great article ?
Letting go of expectations. It can be so hard but I think it’s so important!